The Hilltop House - Washington D.C. (Apartment Review)

When I lived in Washington DC I searched for an apartment in the Columbia Heights area that was moderately priced and close to where I needed to be. With little time left in my search I came across the Hilltop House caddy corner from Meridian Park. When I met the building manager everything seemed great, she assured me there was no noise in the building, the pest problem was treated and manageable and she would be available whenever we needed her. Well...okay. And those of you that know me or just read this blog probably know I don't come from a pristine environment, but when I'm paying four times what my current car payment is, I'd like to live in peace. Where do I start?

#1 - The Window. We used to have a few guys that would come hang outside directly next to our window, smoking weed and drinking, pissing outside our window, yelling about how they keep it real..etc. Which is semi-fine other than I had a girlfriend that while I was out I did not feel safe having there by herself. So I told the building manager she needed to take care of it. Did she ever say anything? Does it matter because they came right back. Solution: lock the fucking gate so they can't walk back in the cut. Problem solved.

#2 - The doors. When we moved in I tested the doors outside the apartment because we were in a special hallway where no other apartments were located. Before we moved in I told her if the doors were loud that we were not interested in the apartment. She assured me they were not. Well when a door shut the reverberation was so loud that it shook our apartment door. Imagine this happening at least 15 times a day until Arthur calls it quits for the work day. Solution: Put some rubber stoppers on those heavy steel doors or add a hinge that allows the doors to close slowly. Problem solved. 

#3 - The roaches. Want to know the extent of the problem? One night while we laid talking in bed a roach came running up from the foot of the bed directly at our faces. The roach was declaring war to take back its territory. Fuck.






















#4 - The bums. My girlfriend went to take the trash out and came running back in the apartment because some guy smoking cigarettes approached her in the hallway OF OUR FUCKING BUILDING asking for some money. I went outside the apartment and told him to step. He replies in a threatening manner, "peace and respect, i dont want to rob or kill you, if you just give me some money." I told him whatever he wants to do and he's about to get fucked up. As we make our way into the lobby, guess who appears to my right? The building manager. She asks is there a problem? Of course there's a problem! There's a fucking bum in the lobby about to get stomped out. Open your eyes you nut. I'm still pissed about that day.





















b) Another late night coming back from Pizza Hut we walked into our hallway and we saw two sets of eyes glaring out of the closet closest to our apartment door. I told my girl to run into the apartment and we got into the door and locked it. We both then looked out the peephole and saw a man and a woman coming out of the door picking up dropped drugs and their dropped pants. Okay so homeless drug addicts were looking for a place to get fucked. Cool. But not here. So after the hobo woman ran out of the hallway, the man soon followed. I saw this as my opportunity to strike. I picked up a baton and darted into the hallway after him. As he and I entered the lobby he turned to me and started to apologize. He explained that he was looking for somewhere to get with his woman and do a little heroin. He said he wouldnt use this building again. I felt bad for him and I told him I didn't care if he used this building again, just never set foot in that hallway. And we agreed like men that he could do whatever he wanted with his girl and his drugs anywhere in the building, but not around where I stay.

#5 - The flood.  Before we moved out a flood hit our bedroom area. It ruined part of the bed frame, our sneakers on the floor. Shit happens but it'd be nice to know where the water came from because it smelled like piss.























#6 - The walls. Tapping on the walls for a few months every morning bright and early. Great way to spend your day off with unexplainable hammering on your walls that your building manager can't help you with.

Other than that everything was fine. I'm sure some people have had decent experiences at the Hilltop House, but this is my story. Go around the corner and find a place equally priced with none of the same inconveniences.  The next apartment I stayed at on the same block around the corner was perfect.